General Lifestyle

THE FUNNY PEOPLE IN EVERY BAR

A bar is a place people meet, hangout to share drinks and stories. At such people are bound to be there. People of different culture, tradition, religion, skill and vocation and style are always gathered. To most young and aging young men and women there are different people you have the opportunity to meet at a bar. I have been to a few and there are a lot of characters in a bar. If you are someone who likes laughing and smiling at all-time then going to the bar and not getting high will make your day.
It is important to note there are seven (7) categories of people you meet at a bar. Now it is not that these people are always in this mood or category all the time but the personality they become in a bar is affected by the mood and the alcohol they take. Below are some of them.

The Big Money Spender
Every bar has the big money spender. They are a major character in the bar and they usually buy drinks for everyone around their table. Most times the factor that influences or causes this free will style, ranges from winning a contract to relocation from a city which they are living in. They always have money to pay for all the drink they consume. Growing up with friends who are big money spenders makes me understands that most big money spenders always wake up the next morning wondering how they blew their cash away. For the big money spenders, they don’t make you laugh on the day they are spending but always get you cracked up in wild laughter the next day after they have gone through their hangover and account analysis.

The No Money Spender

This guy is a direct opposite of the big money spender. He comes to the bar without shi-shi (Nigerian term for no money). There are two sub-categories of the no money spender. There is the broke and can’t give guy and the stingy and won’t give guy.
The broke and can’t give is a guy who has the freewill and thinking to buy his guys some buzz but has no funds to back up his intension. He is either out of job, having financial crisis or having problems with his loan. Although this guy could also be a big money slender on few occasions, this guy usually does not really have what to give at that moment. The other category is the guy that is not broke but stingy and calls it clever in his mind. He is always the guy to suggest visiting the bar after work and buys himself a jug of bear and waits for others to refill it. He is usually the most social guy in the bar because he increases his value in the clique of friends through his good art of storytelling. Note, this guy might not always be the major guy telling the stories but will always be the initiator of the gist.

The Encyclopedia
I call this guy the encyclopedia because he is the all-knowing guy in a guy’s bar clique. He only needs two bottles of beer to start talking and become the major voice in the bar. Some encyclopedias usually self-proclaim themselves of being very vast although in some occasions fall short of their claim. They are naturally gifted with loud voice. Are mostly extroverts and usually very tall. They make a bar lively and are always at the beck and call of the stingy guy. They are natural argue lords and sometimes may argue blindly under the influence of alcohol. They have an evenly distributed fan and hate base. They have fans who believe and feel amused by their excessive talk. But have lots of haters because of their loud mouth. They are needed in a bar at all times and always available.

The all table guy

This is a guy who is usually drunk. He moves from table to table demanding for more drinks, adding to the conversations and dancing. Usually a bar is not usually a place where you dance all the time, but this fellow will always have a way of moving to and fro table bumping into people’s clique. The funny thing about this kind of dude is that he never ever comes with any clique to the bar and when he does he doesn’t really sit with them. He walks from one table to another greeting and throwing handshakes and welcoming any gift of buzz from anyone and everyone.

The cold one
This is a guy who never drinks and is just there to enjoy the game on the TV. He buys himself a bottle of drink and munch his meat with little worry on what goes on around him. He argues less and talks less, He is usually dragged to the bar buy his friend and never stays too long.

The Fighter
A hot tempered guy who get angry at every slightest word throw at him. He laughs when people makes jokes at others but becomes very angry when the jokes are about him. He is always going to fight before he leave the bar. There are also two sub-categories of this set of bar visitors. There is the guy who will get down with a fight if situation warrants it; and the category of persons who will only scare their opponents with well-crafted words. These set of people make the bar uncomfortable and make the bar manager lose money because people usually leave before, during and after a fight.

The Peace Maker
This persons often times become the victims of most bar fights. They are people who are friends to the fighters who tend to want to make peace or increase the number of persons fighting. Most times they lose their self and become the major fighter or fight victims. And at the end never ever make peace.

Valentine Chiamaka

Valentine Chiamaka

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